Sensible Saturday / Sunday

I don't know about you but the weekends are hard for me. I can throw away all my good work in 2/3 days and not give it a second thought. I can eat take away, drink wine, eat crisps and not think twice about my diet.

I tell myself I can start again on Monday, I can starve myself Mon - Wed and not see too much damage on the scales. I can pretend I deserve the blow out cause I lost a lb or two. I can go into complete denial and not give a damn.

So this weekend I decided to be sensible. I made yummy fruit salads, drank lots of water, stocked up on low fat healthy alternatives if I did want to snack on crisps or a biscuit. I ate smaller portions on my new smaller dinner plate. I went for a walk on Saturday - 2.61 mile in 60 mins pushing MillyMooMoo in her travel system (must get a lighter pushchair before I do myself some damage!).

So I've got to remember if the scales are not my friend on Wednesday not to be disheartened. Not to give up. I will see the rewards in future weeks. I will drop lbs. I will lose weight and get healthy. I will stay positive. I will stay focused. I will see 199lb before the end of April.

Why, oh why?

Did I have that Chinese last night?

Did I have half that chocolate egg this afternoon?

Did I skip dinner and end up having 4 rounds of white bread / toast instead?

Did I have that chocolate biscuit with my tea tonight?

I think it was because Husband was away and two of the kids were staying with my sister, so I just kicked back. That would be OK if I didn't have so much weight to loose. If I didn't have so much work to do on getting myself fit.

I'm now upset that I let myself down. Angry that I threw away any willpower I had started to nurture and will probably have to built it up again.

Thinking hard about this behaviour I now understand why my weight yo-yo's so much week to week. In the last 10 weeks I've dropped -4.2lb. I am happy with that but at the same time, in the back of my mind, I know I could put nearly all that back on in one week, on a blow out like I just had today. This makes me feel physically sick. I could spiral downward further if I let this feeling take hold or I can try to do something about it - turn it into a positive.

I can reach for the water bottle tonight.

Plan to walk this weekend.

Eat healthy from now to Wednesday and hopefully the scales won't show too much damage.

Don't beat myself up over this slip up.

Wednesday Weigh In

Down -2.2lb on last week. Happy with this given the Easter holidays.

I'm not getting out walking, finding it hard with the kids being off school, doing family stuff etc. Husband is off to Liverpool in the morning, leaving me on my own with the 3 girls Thursday & Friday. Will try to get out at least once before the end of the week. To make up for this, Husband is off work next week and the kids go back to school. This should free up some 'me time' and I'll be walking my butt off!

My eating is good but I know I could be doing better. Using the smaller dinner plate is helping (with portion control anyway). Need to plan a bit better. Need to eat more fruit & veg.

Drinking water became part of my daily routine again at the weekend. I've missed it, just didn't realise it!

For the first time in a long time, I think 199lb is within my reach. I don't think I'll make it by my birthday on the 15th, as I'd have liked but possibly by the end of April. I didn't realise how much I really wanted it. I see it now as an achievable goal.

Dailymile

I joined Dailymile yesterday and set out on my first walk tonight, pushing the baby in the pram too!

I was glad I went out, glad I got started again but totally paranoid too. I kept thinking everyone in cars coming towards me were laughing at my red face and everyone in cars coming behind me were laughing at big ass. Despite this, I was buzzing when I got home. I walked 2 mile in 40 mins. It's a start, a positive start - just to keep it up now.