Why, oh why?

Did I have that Chinese last night?

Did I have half that chocolate egg this afternoon?

Did I skip dinner and end up having 4 rounds of white bread / toast instead?

Did I have that chocolate biscuit with my tea tonight?

I think it was because Husband was away and two of the kids were staying with my sister, so I just kicked back. That would be OK if I didn't have so much weight to loose. If I didn't have so much work to do on getting myself fit.

I'm now upset that I let myself down. Angry that I threw away any willpower I had started to nurture and will probably have to built it up again.

Thinking hard about this behaviour I now understand why my weight yo-yo's so much week to week. In the last 10 weeks I've dropped -4.2lb. I am happy with that but at the same time, in the back of my mind, I know I could put nearly all that back on in one week, on a blow out like I just had today. This makes me feel physically sick. I could spiral downward further if I let this feeling take hold or I can try to do something about it - turn it into a positive.

I can reach for the water bottle tonight.

Plan to walk this weekend.

Eat healthy from now to Wednesday and hopefully the scales won't show too much damage.

Don't beat myself up over this slip up.